The Aftermath
by ChokolateKiss
Summary: After Marissa'a death, Ryan is not the same person he used to be.  He's dark, angry and no one can help him as he sinks deeper and deeper in a black hole. The only person who can save him is dead...or is she?  Ryan and Marissa.  Please read and review :
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

Ryan Atwood had never had a stable life growing up. When he was a young child, his father had been arrested for armed robbery and was sent to prison, after which his mother moved him and his older brother Trey from Fresno to Chino, California. Moving into a small shack, their happy new start ended abruptly when Dawn began going through a series of boyfriends, each one worse than the one before. The last one was AJ and as the epitome of white trailer trash, he had been the worst. He and Dawn would almost always be drunk and AJ would lay his hands on Ryan, beating him violently.

One night, in the midst of using both drugs and alcohol, Trey got the crazy idea to steal a car. Seeing a police car not too far away, Ryan got in against his better judgment. The car chase was short-lived and pretty soon, both Atwood brothers were sent to jail. The following morning was when Ryan's life would suddenly change: his first meeting with Sandy Cohen. As his court-appointed defense attorney, Sandy had gotten Ryan out of jail and upon meeting Ryan's mother, his heart went out to the young boy. He gave him his home phone number in case he ever needed help.

Once Ryan had gotten home, his mom Dawn kicked him out and after another physical fight with AJ, Ryan packed what little things he had and ran away. With no where else to go and no one else to turn to, Ryan dialed Sandy's number. Thinking back, he still remembered the faint smell of fresh salt water coming from the beach as they drove along the coast and entered Newport, Orange County. Sandy had gone inside his house to explain the situation to his wife Kirsten while Ryan waited outside. Walking down the driveway, he had reached into his pocket for a cigarette and that's when he saw her for the first time: Marissa Cooper, the girl who stole his heart that night with a single smile.

When Sandy returned, they went inside together and he met Kirsten and eventually Seth, their nerdy, comic-book loving son. As the memories continued, Ryan remembered everything from the Model Home, to Sandy and Kirsten becoming his legal guardians, to Cotillion and to Tijuana, where Marissa had OD'd after finding her boyfriend Luke with another girl. When he had found her unconscious body, Ryan had stopped breathing altogether. Seeing her unmoving form curled up in a dirty alley, Ryan couldn't help his heart from breaking. She had lived, though, and he swore to himself that he wouldn't miss another chance to tell her how he truly felt.

Next came a series of good memories he had of her, his two favorite being their first kiss on top of the ferries wheel and their New Year's Eve kiss weeks later, where they shared their 'I love you's' for the first time. But all good things eventually come to an end and so did their relationship thanks to Marissa burgeoning friendship with Oliver, a boy that she had met during her therapy sessions…a boy that Ryan never trusted and had been right about.

After the Oliver drama finally unfolded, Marissa wanted to make up but Ryan was unable to trust her again and eventually broke up with her. After a brief fling with his old childhood friend Teresa from Chino, Ryan realized that Marissa was the only girl he cared for and he took her back. But Teresa showed up on his doorstep one day, pregnant and scared, and in a bittersweet goodbye with the Cohens, Seth and Marissa, he left with her back to Chino.

Months passed and Teresa realized how depressed Ryan was that he had left his family and came up with a lie that she had lost the child so he would go back. Bidding her farewell, Ryan returned to Newport to the awaiting arms of his family and friends. But his relationship with Marissa was too strained and they ended up going their separate ways. When his brother Trey was released from jail, Ryan picked him up and brought him back to Newport to stay with him and the Cohens until he got back on his feet, all the while knowing that Trey was bad news but trusting and having faith in his brother nonetheless. Marissa went out of her way to help Trey and this brought her and Ryan back together as he was able to trust her again.

But their relationship was about to hit another disastrous bump in the road when a drunk Trey tried to rape Marissa one night. She hid the small scars on her neck from Ryan and swore to keep the secret, but Ryan eventually found out through Seth and Summer and went to confront Trey. After a bloody fistfight, Trey got the upper hand and began suffocating Ryan. Marissa arrived and tried her hardest to pull him off, but it was no use. Seeing Ryan dying, Marissa did the only thing she could think of: she grabbed Trey's gun and shot him. Nothing would ever be the same again after that night.

The months that followed were some of the hardest of their lives. Once Trey woke up and questions surrounding his shooting were finally answered, they desperately tried to make things better between them. Trey left town and they tried to put everything behind them, but were unable to do so. Getting kicked out of their private school didn't make things any easier for them. Even though Ryan was eventually allowed back in, Marissa was forced to go to public school and that's when she met Johnny Harper. As Marissa spent more and more time with Johnny, her relationship with Ryan suffered because of it. At the end, they had grown too distant from one another and far too much damage had been caused. When Marissa finally realized what she was doing, she told Johnny that her heart lied with Ryan and tried to make things better with her boyfriend. Unable to stand the rejection, Johnny got drunk one night and slipped off a cliff. Ryan and Marissa had arrived and Ryan had reached out for his hand, but Johnny slipped away and fell to his death. After his funeral, they found it too difficult to be together anymore and they broke up for the final time.

Ryan began dating Sadie, Johnny's cousin, and out of her sadness for losing both a friend and her boyfriend, Marissa began sleeping with Kevin Volchuk, a no-good, lowlife who drank his days away on the beach. Everyone, including Ryan, tried intervening but she was hell-bent on acting out. After seeing him with another girl in a repeat of her experience with Luke, Marissa left Volchuk and got her head on her shoulders before graduation. The night of graduation would soon become the worst night of Ryan's entire existence for he would have never been able to foresee the tragedy that awaited him. After a tumultuous three years in Newport that saw both ups and downs, Ryan's life was about to come to a screeching halt.

As he drove Marissa to the airport where she was to take a year off and go be with her father, they had a good outlook for the future of their relationship. All of a sudden, an angry Volchuk chased them in his van and soon ran their car over the side of the road. Once he finally came to, Ryan pulled an injured Marissa out of the burning car and carried her away from the flames before his knees buckled beneath him and he fell to the ground. She was awake and he wanted to go for help, but she begged him not to leave her. All of his desperate pleas and tears were useless, though, and she died right there in his arms. Her eyes slowly closed, her breathing softened and her heartbeat gradually stopped.

The ride to the hospital and the memories that followed were all a blur for Ryan. All he remembered was her frail body in his arms on the side of the road, the paramedics trying their hardest to revive her and the doctors telling him that she was dead at the hospital. Ryan Atwood would never again be the same as he was about to enter the darkest phase of his life.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Parking their Range Rover in the dark alleyway, Sandy and Kirsten Cohen began heading towards the bar. As they opened the door and stepped inside, everyone turned and stared at them over the loud, blaring rock music which played in the background.

"Come on," Sandy said firmly as he escorted his wife towards the bar owner who stood behind the counter sipping a drink. "We're looking for Ryan Atwood. Is he in his room?"

Sighing, the young man turned towards them and shook his head.

"I've told you before, man," he began. "He doesn't want to see you."

"We're his parents," Kirsten exclaimed as they left the bar and walked to a small back room which used to be a storage area for maintenance equipment.

They hadn't seen Ryan ever since Marissa's funeral three months ago. He had taken off midway through the ceremony and they had not heard from or seen him since then. The only news they had was what little information Seth told them from the couple times he had been able to see Ryan. Glancing back at her husband for a brief moment, Kirsten gently knocked on the door.

"Ryan?" she called softly. "Sweetie, are you in there?"

Inside the room, a disheveled Ryan turned towards the door, recognizing the voice that was calling him. His hair and face were both a mess, his eyes were bloodshot and the wife-beater he wore seemed one size too big for him as he had lost a lot of weight. Grabbing his jacket, Ryan quickly slipped outside through the small window in the room.

"We just want to see you sweetie," Kirsten tried again.

Realizing that they were getting no response, Sandy stepped forward and opened the door. Flicking the lights on, tears appeared in Kirsten's eyes as she glanced around the small room. It was dark and had a grave atmosphere to it. There was a small, unmade cot in the corner of the room with a backpack thrown onto it and several empty alcohol bottles on the ground with cigarette butts all over the floor.

"Oh my God," Kirsten exclaimed, clasping her hand over her mouth before facing her equally stunned and worried husband. "He can't stay here, Sandy. Look at all of this."

Picking up one of the empty bottles, she read the brand and shook her head as tears rolled down her cheeks.

"They're all vodka," she whispered, placing the bottle back down.

Nodding worriedly, Sandy ran his hand through his hair, unable to find the right words to tell his wife to comfort her about their son. When Ryan had first arrived in Newport, he had gotten into trouble many times. After they had told him that they would be his legal guardians and that he could stay with them, he had tried his hardest to stay out of trouble. But as time passed, it became known that trouble simply followed him despite his best efforts; from Oliver, to Trey, to the shooting, to Dean Hess, to Johnny, Volchuk and finally Marissa's death. The funeral had been held three days after her death and while Julie and Kaitlyn Cooper both cried along with themselves, Summer and even Seth, Ryan never shed a single tear. He had simply stood there silently and when the Priest had asked him to speak, he had turned around and walked away. That was the last they had seen of him and seeing all of the alcohol and cigarette butts on the ground was a reality check for Sandy and Kirsten as to how distraught their son was.

"Come on, let's go," he said, guiding his wife back through the bar until they were outside.

The worried parents got back in their car and reluctantly drove off towards home. Once they were gone, Ryan stepped out of the shadows and walked back inside the bar silently. Heading towards the counter, he ran into the owner, Steve.

"Your family really cares about you, kid," the young man exclaimed.

Staring into Ryan's eyes, the man saw how troubled and pained he was.

"Who?" was all Ryan said.

"Are you sure you want to do this tonight?" Steve asked in concern.

"Especially tonight," was his reply.

Nodding quietly, Steve walked over to him and together they head out the back door of the bar. Cutting across the alley, they entered another building and walked through the large crowd towards the center, where a cage sat. It was an underground cage-fighting arena.

"Who did I draw?" Ryan asked, removing his jacket and tossing it on a vacant nearby chair.

"Him," Steve replied, pointing to a man matching Ryan's physical height and weight.

"No," she stated, shaking his head and pointing to the heaviest fighter in the room. "Him."

"Kid, you're going to get yourself killed. Is that what you want?" Steve asked, his voice showing his concern.

Looking up to meet his gaze, Ryan's eyes had a deadly anger in them that scared the other man.

"Good," was all he said before walking towards the entrance of the cage.

Once the fight began, Ryan simply stood back and allowed the bigger man to attack him without putting up much of a fight. Steve shouted at him to fight back, but Ryan wanted to feel the pain. He wanted to numb the ache in his heart by feeling physical pain. The fight lasted ten minutes and once the heavier man was applauded, Ryan simply laid on his back, his eyes swollen and blood trickling down the side of his face. As Steve rushed to his side, he saw a smile on Ryan's face that scared him more than the look he had seen in his eyes earlier. The smile seemed almost suicidal and that sent a chill down Steve's spine.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

When they arrived home, Seth and Summer were both sitting on the living room couch in silence. They both rose to their feet when they saw Seth's parents enter the house.

"Did you see him?" Seth asked curiously.

"How is he?" Summer said quietly.

Sighing, Sandy shook his head.

"He wasn't in his room," he explained as Kirsten slowly sat down on a chair across from them.

"His room…," she began, but her sentence trailed off as she held back her tears.

"What?" Seth asked in worry, looking between his parents.

"There were empty alcohol bottles everywhere…and cigarette butts," Sandy answered for his wife. "His room was just so cold and empty."

Sighing, Seth slumped down in his seat, unsure of what to say as Summer gazed at him sadly. After Marissa's death, Summer had decided to take a year off from school for she wasn't able to think about college when she had just lost her best friend. With her father having moved away to another city for work after he and Julie Cooper had broken up, Summer had began spending most of her nights with the Cohens. They had said nothing when she would go upstairs with Seth every night where he would simply hold her as she cried herself to sleep. The shopping-loving, gossip Queen Summer used to be had disappeared and she was now a more quiet and intense version of herself, with bags under her eyes from all of her sleepless nights.

Seth had also become less humorous and more grounded after the tragedy. He wanted to be there for Summer on her good days and bad, to hold her and comfort her when she cried. But he was unable to reach out to Ryan. His adoptive brother had simply shut down and closed himself off from all sort of help and support and had moved out the day of the funeral without even a goodbye. When they had returned home, Kirsten had broken down when she had seen the empty pool house. Seth himself had sat in the pool house all night and had cried for Marissa, for Summer, for his parents, for Julie and Kaitlyn and especially for Ryan. He loved his brother very much and wanted nothing more than to help him, but was unable to do so and that hurt him deeply.

"What can we do?" Seth began quietly.

"I don't know," Sandy replied as he, too, sat down. "I feel like he's slipping away from us more and more every day and I'm afraid we're going to lose him."

As tears formed in her eyes, Summer took a shaky breath.

"I have to go," she said as Seth faced her.

Kissing her boyfriend's cheek goodbye, she quickly turned and rushed out of the house. She and Seth had not even kissed after Marissa's death for Summer was unable to be intimate with or close to anyone. Getting in her car, she turned on the engine and pulled out of the driveway. The drive down to her destination was a long one, but it was one that she had wanted to do for months. As much as her heart went out to Ryan, she was also angry at him for he wasn't the only one grieving for Marissa. Although she had not gotten over the pain yet, not by a long shot, she was trying her hardest to live without her best friend. Ryan seemed as if he didn't even care anymore from what Seth had told her.

After a while, she pulled her car to a stop in the same alleyway as the Cohens had earlier that night. Getting out of her car, she buttoned a few more buttons on her black jacket before heading inside the bar. Ignoring all the looks she was getting, Summer's eyes scanned the bar for someone in charge. Her eyes finally landed on Steve and she approached him silently.

"You seem out of place," he said.

"Is he here?" she asked him softly, her eyes still glistening from the tears she had shed in the car.

"Who are you looking for sweetheart?" Steve asked, his voice friendly but also holding a hint of sadness.

"Ryan," Summer stated as the young man nodded.

"I thought you were," he said. "His folks were here earlier."

"Where is he?" Summer asked.

Pointing to his room, Steve sighed. "I'll tell you the same thing I told them. He doesn't want to see you."

"Well that's too bad for him," Summer replied and came to head towards the room when Steve grabbed her arm, spinning her around.

"I have to warn you…he doesn't look too good," he exclaimed as she pulled out of his grasp and kept walking.

She came to knock on his door, but thought better of it and grabbed the doorknob. Taking a deep breath, she slowly turned the knob and stepped inside the room. It was small and dark and she wasn't able to see much. Feeling around for a light, she gasped when she felt someone grab her from behind.

"What do you want?" Ryan growled in a voice belonging to an animal.

Even though she was scared, Summer took a shaky breath and spoke. "It's me….Summer."

His grip on her tiny frame gradually softened until he pulled away from her and moved towards his bed. Grabbing the doorknob to steady her breathing, Summer felt around for a light.

"Leave it off," Ryan's voice came in a quiet but cold and emotionless whisper.

From the light coming from the window, she was able to see his figure, but not his face which is what she wanted to see. But she nodded regardless and quietly approached him, sitting down next to him and yet keeping her distance out of fear that he would lash out at her again.

"What are you doing here?" he asked her suddenly, keeping his eyes glued on the floor.

"I wanted to see you," she replied honestly. "I'm worried about you, Atwood."

She wished that by using his last name like she always did, she would get some sort of positive response from him, but all she got was silence.

"I miss you," she added.

"I never asked you to worry about me," he replied. "Go home."

"No," she said and shook her head. "Don't you know by now how stubborn I am? I'm not leaving here until I get what I want."

"What do you want?" Ryan asked after a minute.

"I want to see you," she said softly. "I want to see your face."

Turning towards her finally, he held her gaze as she saw his red, bloodshot eyes through the dark.

"You don't want to see me," he said quietly.

Summer remained quiet, taking in his eyes for a minute before he looked away again.

"Your parents miss you so much Ryan," she began, using his first name in a sincere tone. "So does Seth. They're all worried sick about you."

When he didn't reply, she bit her lip and spoke again.

"They want to help you," she continued. "They came here tonight to see you but all they saw were empty alcohol bottles."

"I never asked them to come," he stated.

"I know you didn't," she agreed. "It doesn't mean they weren't going to come and that they won't continue coming again. You're a part of their family and they love you."

Ryan turned his face away from her in the darkness, not wanting to listen to her any further.

"I miss you too," she repeated and reached out for his face. "Please, Ryan…just come home. Let your family help you. Let me help you…we can help each other."

When she touched his face, he jumped back slightly and marginally pulled away, but didn't get up. Taking this as a sign to push forward, she turned his face towards hers again and looked into his eyes.

"Come home with me, Ryan," she repeated.

They held their gaze for a long moment before he rose to his feet and disappeared into the darkness of the room. Summer sat on the bed in silence, unsure if he had left or not when all of a sudden, the lights turned on. The first thing she saw was the alcohol bottles the Cohens had mentioned earlier and the cigarette butts that were scattered all over. Leaning her face up, she finally looked at him and gasped loudly when she did. Summer saw the weight he had lost and the bruises on his face and arms. She saw the blood on his face and his red, swollen eyes.

"Ryan…," she said sadly and rose to her feet, tears rolling down her cheeks for the third time that day.

When she came to reach out for him, he backed away to his door and held his hands up in protest, causing her to stop in her spot.

"You can't help me, Summer," he said, his voice on the verge of breaking down. "No one can help me."

"Please…at least let us try," Summer pleaded with him.

They grew silent for another minute before she spoke up once more.

"I miss her too," she finally said, voicing the pain that they both felt.

Sniffling quietly, Ryan ran a hand through his hair but said nothing. Taking another chance to reach out for him, Summer closed the distance between them and took his hands in hers. He tried to pull away, but she held a tight grip on him.

"Come home with me Ryan," she said sadly. "At least come and see your family…please."

He stared at her for a couple minutes and noticed the desperation in her eyes which matched that in her voice. Sighing, he pulled away from her quickly and walked to the other side of the room, keeping his back to her.

"Just one visit," he said, his voice cold once more.

"Okay," she said softly, happy that she had convinced him of even this much. "My car's outside. Take your time."

And with a final glance at his frame from behind, Summer turned and walked out of his room, closing the door behind him. Once she was gone, Ryan sat back down on his bed and removed a small box from under his bed. Opening the box, he removed pictures of the Cohens, of the Fab Four and finally Marissa. He held onto a picture of Marissa that he had taken on the beach last summer, after the shooting. The smile on her face as she gazed at him behind the camera pulled on his heart, just like it had the first time they had met all those nights ago. Gazing down at the picture, he didn't realize that he was crying until a single tear streamed down his cheek. Angrily putting the pictures back in the box, he wiped the tear away and wore his jacket. Walking over to the sink, he dabbed cold water on his face and tried to rub some of the blood away, but his attempt didn't get very far and the bruises were still there. Sighing, he dried his face, turned the light off and walked out of his room. Steve watched as Ryan quietly walked out of the bar, seeming to have calmed down after talking to the petite brunette. He didn't have that same suicidal look Steve had seen in his eyes earlier.

As he walked outside, he saw Summer seated in her car and head towards her. A sigh of relief escaped her lips as she watched him cross the alleyway and get in her car. Once he climbed in, she started the car and pulled into the main road. They exchanged no words as he pulled a cigarette out of his pocket, lit it and slightly pulled his window down. Taking a couple puffs, he closed his eyes and exhaled heavily. As she stopped behind a red light, Summer turned her face and gazed at him. He was a far cry from the person he use to be and his eyes were the saddest ones she had ever looked into. She had thought that both her and Julie had seemed the worst after the tragedy, but looking at Ryan now for the first time in three months, Summer realized just how torn and broken he was and her heart broke for him as she drove in the silence of the dark night.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

The entire car ride had been incredibly silent and although Summer had tried to stir up some sort of conversation several times, Ryan simply replied in one-word answers or didn't reply at all. Pulling into the Cohen driveway, Summer switched the engine off and faced her friend.

"Are you ready to go in?" she asked him quietly.

Sighing, he opened his car door and got out.

"I'll take that as a yes," she said to herself before getting out after him.

They walked up the driveway together until Summer noticed that Ryan had stopped. He had his back to her and was gazing down at the end of the driveway. A smile appeared on his face as a memory flooded into his mind. It was the first night at the Cohen's and while Sandy had gone inside to explain things to Kirsten, Ryan had remained outside to smoke and that's when he saw her.

"_Who are you?" Marissa had asked with a curious spark in her eyes._

"_Whoever you want me to be," he had replied, trying his hardest to appear cool and mysterious._

He now saw the moment before him as if he were reliving the memory. But a voice pulled him out of his thoughts and back to reality as he turned to face Summer.

"I've been calling you for two minutes. Are you alright?" she asked him worriedly.

Not answering her, he moved his eyes back to where Marissa had just been standing, but she was gone. Looking down sadly, he turned and walked past Summer quietly. Unsure what to say, Summer simply followed him to the door. Twisting the knob to the side, they entered the house before Summer hurried off to find the Cohens. Standing at the door, Ryan gazed around the house he had learned to call 'home' with a sad look in his eyes. Looking around for them, she finally entered the dining room where Sandy, Kirsten and Seth were all gathered at the table finishing their dinner.

"Hi sweetheart," Kirsten began.

"You should have told us you were coming for dinner, kiddo. We would have saved you a plate," Sandy added.

Noticing the weird expression on his girlfriend's face, Seth placed his fork down and fully faced her.

"Summer, what is it?" he asked.

"You guys…," she began with a nervous smile, but her sentence trailed off.

Unable to form any more words, she stepped slightly to the side just as Ryan walked in. Silence engulfed the entire household as he slowly lifted his gaze and made eye contact with them. It was the first time they had seen him after months of anguish and worry. Letting her emotions overtake her, Kirsten ran around the table and pulled the boy into a tight embrace as tears streamed down her cheeks. As everyone else looked on, Ryan's face seemed lost and his arms remained stiff at his side. Leaning back, Kirsten held the sides of his face and took in the bruises they held before staring into his emotionless eyes.

"Ryan…," she cried out, but it was useless.

Seeing that his wife wasn't getting anywhere, Sandy walked up to the two of them and placed a hand on Ryan's shoulder. All that emerged was another blank look, only this one was directed at him.

"Ryan, we are so happy that you're home and that you're safe," Sandy expressed, pulling the boy in for another hug.

When he gave no response, Summer glanced away sadly just as Seth approached them.

"Hey man," he said carefully.

Ryan turned his face towards his brother/best friend and strained his eyes for a moment before taking a step back in confusion.

"What am I doing here?" he suddenly asked.

"Summer brought you home, sweetie," Kirsten replied and reached out for him, but he pulled away from her.

Turning his gaze to the petite brunette, he waited for her to speak.

"I came to see you tonight and I asked you to come home for a visit," she explained, reminding him of their conversation earlier. "You agreed because we both know I can't physically force you to do anything."

Her attempt to get a smile out of him was shot down when he looked away from her, his frown still planted firmly on his face.

"Ryan, I know how difficult these past few months have been for you," Sandy began. "But we're you're family and all we want to do is try and help you through all of this because we love you."

"All you have to do is stay and let us try," Kirsten added.

"We all miss you, man," Seth stated, the sadness in his voice apparent.

Staring from one face to another for a long moment, he pulled away from them and head to the doors which led to the pool house and the pool outside.

"Is the pool house still mine?" he suddenly asked.

"Of course; nothing's been changed inside," Kirsten replied.

Nodding, he grabbed the knob and swung the door open.

"I'm tired," he stated. "I'm going to bed."

And with that, he left a speechless crowd indoors and walked out.

"Okay, what did that mean?" Seth asked, wanting to analyze every point.

"Does that mean he's staying?" Kirsten asked, facing her husband with hopeful eyes.

"I think it means he wants to stay and he's going to give it a try," Sandy replied. "But we can't crowd him or push him too hard. We have to let him come to us."

"Sandy, his face was so bruised," Kirsten expressed worriedly.

"I know and we'll find out everything soon, but we have to pace ourselves," he said before rubbing his wife's back in comfort.

As they glanced at one another with unsure expressions on their faces, they turned to face the pool house. Outside, Ryan opened the door of the pool house and stepped into the darkness formerly known as his room. Feeling around for a light switch, he flicked it on and saw that nothing had been rearranged. Glancing around his old room, his eyes finally landed on the bed and despite his best attempts, another memory washed over him.

_It was night and Marissa was lying on the bed in the pool house, breathing heavily. Ryan moved on top of her and leaned down as they began kissing. As he kissed her neck, she giggled and slightly pushed him away._

"_Ticklish," she reminded him as he smiled._

"_Sorry," he said and slowly moved his hands to go up her top, but she stopped him with her hand._

"_Hey, what time do you have?" she asked._

_Although he was still kissing her, Ryan managed to glance at his watch. "Almost eleven. What time do you have to get back to your dad's?"_

"_Soon," she said, smiling as they kissed again._

"_How soon?" he mumbled while kissing her._

"_Now," she said with a laugh._

_They kissed a bit more before Marissa sat up, moved to the end of the bed and began putting her shoes on._

"_You can't call and say you'll be late?" Ryan asked, grabbing her arm and pulling her to him before kissing her again._

_Before she was able to move, he grabbed her shoes out of her hands and held them up._

"_I'm already late!" she expressed with a laugh._

_Falling back onto his bed, he held one shoe on either side of his head and smiled at her._

"_It's a school night," she tried again, but he simply smiled at her._

_Laughing, she moved on top of him and laid her head on his chest._

"_It's too bad you don't still live next door," he expressed._

"_Yeah, but then I'd have to talk to my mom," she said._

"_You haven't talked to her?" he asked, stroking her head._

_Sighing, she shook her head. "No, she keeps trying to call me but there's absolutely no way that I'll…."_

"_Hey…," Ryan said, trying to calm her down._

"_Sorry," she apologized._

_Thinking for a moment, a smile appeared on his face._

"_Maybe this weekend, we could spend a whole night together," he began as she lifted her face to gaze at him. "You know, we could go out, we could do something, finally have our first official date. No school, no parents…just us."_

_With a huge smile on her face, she nodded. "Saturday night."_

_With that, they leaned in and began kissing again._

When they memory flowed away, Ryan didn't notice the tears that had streamed down his cheeks. Wiping the tears away angrily, he removed his cell phone and dialed a local phone number. He waited three rings before speaking.

"It's me," he said in a slightly shaky voice. "I need some tomorrow."

The person on the other line spoke a few words before Ryan leaned his eyes up, revealing a deadly and self-destructive gaze.

"I'm back in the O.C," he said before snapping his phone shut.

Shutting the light back off, he walked over to his bed and sat down in the darkness of the room.


End file.
